Short troopers, buckets, hats and cons

Big Wow- Part II

Big Wow 2014 was about much more than whacking people with my blaster.  (That sounds wrong out of context, but I can get away with saying things like that since I'm a lady trooper.)  This was the first time I'd ever been to a science fiction convention.  

I had table duty for a few hours on Saturday morning and it gave me an opportunity to do a great deal of people watching.

The behavior of people at conventions is interesting.  Everyone has their own specific agenda.  Some are collectors.  They want to buy something that gives them bragging rights afterwards.  Other people are there to dress up and be seen.  I couldn't decipher some of the outfits, but as long as people were having fun, good for them.

After I finished my table duty, I went back to the green room to change out of my garrison polo and armor up.  I had a couple of hours before the group photo in the afternoon, so I walked the show floor with some of my fellow troopers.  I stuck with Vader for much of the time.  He seems to get all the love, so it is fun to trail after him.  Plus, at 5'6", I make our 6'5" Vader look that much taller.  I learned that short troopers are very useful, particularly to Sith Lords.

I almost forgot to caption this one. It is so obvious to me which one is me, but I forgot that we look alike to people outside the Legion.  I am standing to Vader's right with the smaller scout in front of the blue curtain.

However, Sith Lords can only stay out for a limited time because the costume is so hot and the crowds can be overwhelming.  So, when Vader when back to the green room to take a breather, I did a few rounds of the convention floor with Kyle.

During this time, I was "rapped" on the head by a show attendee.  Yes, much like the cod knocking incident in Haight-Ashbury, someone felt compelled to explore the composition of the armor.  In this instance, they knocked on the lid of my helmet.  Hard.

Kyle, who always stays in character, was furious.  He yelled at the head knocker, who simply made some stupid comment that I can't even remember.  I was fine.  I have a hard skull.  But, my audio system was knocked askew.  There are a lot of electronics in the helmet.  I went back to the green room to re-adjust everything.  This would not be the last time I was "rapped" on the head at a troop. But, I learned not to take it personally, people are curious about the armor and some can't keep their hands to themselves.

As I mentioned, Dave Filoni was at the convention with us.  He sat and did table duty at our booth.  He was there to meet with fans and sign things for them.  But, he wasn't wearing his hat.  And, without his hat, he is like Clark Kent/Superman and his glasses.  No one seemed clever enough to recognize him.  Someone came up and asked him a question about joining the 501st. Uh, you realize you're talking to the Director of Clone Wars?  Apparently not.  Dave being Dave answered the question and did a great job of it, too.  It was quiet at our table for much of the time because apparently the 501st was not nearly as exciting as some of the other things at the con.  So, Dave doodled sketches on sheets of paper and set them out.  People took them without looking who did them and walked on.  The tables surrounding us were other Star Wars fan groups and they were clever enough to figure out Dave with or without the hat.  They came by and had a great opportunity to get things signed.  I had my garrison jacket signed.  Some of our troopers talked hockey with Dave.   Eventually, we all went off to do our garrison photo and then Dave headed off for some other activities.  But, the whole hat thing was very funny to me.

Right.  Nothing to see here. Just grab an informational brochure and move along.

Big Wow was a two day convention and that was a lot of hours in armor.  You can only be in there for so long before your body starts to hurt.  So, I took breaks and changed back out to do table duty.  But, it was a great troop and one I'd definitely do again.

"Only Imperial Stormtroopers are so precise."

I originally wrote this article for the April 2015 issue of the First Imperial Stormtrooper Detachment newsletter on whitearmor.net.  I was asked to write something for a new column called "Memoirs of a Stormtrooper."  I've reprinted the text  in the original form.

MEMOIRS OF A STORMTROOPER


I think my most memorable troop was when I smacked Dave Filoni in the back with my blaster repeatedly.  Mind you, I did not do this intentionally.  However, there are certain skills it takes some time to master and I definitely didn’t have them.

It was May 17, 2014 and I was at BigWow ComicFest San Jose with a number of people from my garrison.   In the evening, there was going to be a special showing of Godzilla.  Dave Filoni is a huge Godzilla fan so he’d come for this event, and spent a few hours in the afternoon at our booth. 

In the middle of the afternoon, we took our group picture.  We were all in our armor, except for Dave.  As our honored guest, Dave was put in the first row.  I ended up in the second row, which probably wasn’t optimal since I’m a bit… eh… short.  But, anyway, there I was and we started taking our pictures.  The “bucket on” pictures were easy enough.  But, then in the end the call came for the “bucket off” shots.   I’d taken my helmet on and off, at least a hundred times at home during my build.  But, I’d never practiced it one-handed with a blaster in my other hand.  Or, attempted to unsnap my holster with gloves on and quickly get my blaster tucked properly.  Word to the wise, these are good skills to master at home so you don’t fumble these group shots.

So, as I was struggling to get my helmet off one-handed in very tight conditions with all of these people around me, I had no idea I was poking my blaster into the person in front of me.  Apparently, I did so repeatedly.  I didn’t become aware of my goof until the person in front of me turned around and gave me a bemused look.

Uggh.

Sorry, Dave.

It is a good thing the man has a sense of humor.

Ever since then I’ve been thinking he should add a segment to Rebels about a stormtrooper so hopeless with their blaster they desert their post and join the Rebellion. (Don’t shoot me.  The show isn’t called Imperials.  Although, that would be an epically good idea for a show.)

Want to take a guess which one is me?  Yep, the wee little one you can barely see poking out over Boba Fett's range finder.  Dave was so nice, too.  He later signed my garrison jacket.  I haven't hit him since.

As the year went by, there were many more memorable troops involving stairs, tripping hazards, hot tarmac, and overzealous Marines.  (Not all at once.)  But, the story that never fails to make everyone laugh and cringe is my faux pas with the blaster.

Knock. Knock. A day in Haight-Ashbury.

 My first May the 4th was memorable.  Maybe for the cod knocking.  Or, maybe just because it was the first time I met so many of my fellow stormtroopers.  But, it was a day which will always stick out in my mind.

The event was hosted by a small toy store in Haight-Ashbury. The event featured special Star Wars products that were only available that day and giveaways, exclusives, signings and a stormtrooper photo booth.

I learned many things that day:

• The folks in the Haight are a very affectionate bunch. 
• Troops are exciting when they are well-attended and people are asking to take pictures with you all day long.  You feel something like a rockstar.
• Free food is awesome and makes you feel even more appreciated.  (The restaurant next door offered all of us lunch.  Awesome.)

But, there were some challenges that day, too.

• Mainly, the affectionate folks in the Haight.  They get a bit carried away in their enthusiasm.   I'm not sure knocking on cod armor is an acceptable social behavior, even in San Francisco.
• I had arms thrown around me for pictures so many times one of my shoulder straps tore loose. It was a great deal of physical contact and hard on the armor.
  
• Stairs.  Ugggh.  It was like a stormtrooper obstacle course.  First, mini-steps through the dark back storeroom.  "I can't see a thing in this..." (You know, the rest.)  Squeeze through a tight space to outside.  Blam!  Bright sunlight.  Then, up another flight of stairs.  Steep steps.  And, that was our staging area.  Ever seen a stormtrooper go up steps?  Or, worse, down.

In this picture, I'm in the middle next to the royal guard. 

I still had fun with all of it, and loved meeting more members of the garrison.  Plus, I had a chance to redeem myself with holding the blaster (hopefully) in a better position.  (I'd been practicing at home in front of the mirror.  Seriously.)

ABC News came by to do a news segment.  Double-decker tour buses came by all day.  People were literally hanging off the sides smiling, waving and snapping pictures. Trolley buses were stopping, and even the SFPD stopped to take pictures. It was a good day to be 501st.

I'm the trooper on the far left.

Life Behind the Green Lens

Admittedly, I should have started writing this blog a year and a half ago.  I've had so many experiences.  But, it took a long time before I was ready to start sharing all I had learned.

Perhaps the greatest part of being in the Legion is how much I've grown as a person.  I knew being a stormtrooper would be fun.  I knew it would be challenging.  I hadn't expect it to make me a better person.

So, I'll try to go back in time a bit, one story at a time, and provide the backstory of how I've come to this point.  And, somehow, I sense the best is yet to come.

This is how I like to spend my weekends. (I'm currently working on a set of Wolfpack armor. I have video of this build, too, if anyone is interested in the process.)

"I can't see a thing in this helmet." (First troop.)

For a long time, I've been wanting to do a blog talking about life behind the green lens.  I have so many stories from my times out trooping.

The best place to start would be the beginning.  My first troop wasn't a total disaster.  But, to quote another short person wearing armor on big outing for the first time:

"I can't see a thing in this helmet." - Luke Skywalker. A New Hope

I was at an event called "SuperHero Saturday" at an elementary school in San Francisco with two fellows troopers.  It was back in April of 2014.  All we had to do was suit up, walk out and take pictures with the cute little kids.  Simple, right?

But, I couldn't see any of the cute little munchkins.

Visibility in a stormtrooper helmet is terrible at the best of times, but something was wrong with my helmet.  Either a piece of padding had slipping, or I hadn't put the helmet on properly in the first place.  But, I was blind, even by stormtrooper standards.  However, I wasn't willing to admit I couldn't see anything.  We were already heading out, and it had already taken me a long time to suit up.  It was my first troop and my pride was at stake.  I decided somehow I would make it work.  So, I stayed very close to my two fellow troopers and kept bumping into them on either side of me.  Clack!  Yup.  There was armor on the left of me.  Clack!  Ok, yes, there was armor to the right of me.

Now, I was fortunate to have my mentor, Kyle, with me on my first troop.  So, at least I was smashing into someone familiar on one side.  And, the trooper on the other side was very tolerant.  We ended up becoming friends.  "Hi!"  (Armored body slam.)  "I'm Diana.  So nice to meet you."  To compound my visibility problems, my lenses fogged up.

"I have to head back to the green room and adjust my helmet.  I can't see," Kyle said to me.

Huh?  What now?  Kyle couldn't see?!

"Uh, OK, then, I'll go with you," I said, blindly stumbling after him through my clouded, foggy lens, trying to keep up with him on the way back to the green room.  Please don't let me step on any kids.

I wiped down my foggy lenses, and repositioned my helmet on my head.  The second time I was able to get it on my head better.  It was still bobbling about on my head, much more so than it did when I was at home.  But, I was able to see enough to get through the troop.

I interacted with the kids and even played a few carnival games with the kids.   The families loved it and it turned out to be an enjoyable afternoon.  The San Francisco Fire Department showed up to take pictures with the kids.  I was excited to see the firetruck.  "Let's go take a picture with them!"  Who doesn't love a firetruck?  The firemen grinned when we came over.

"So glad you stopped by," one of them said, "we were about to come to you.  We wanted to ask if we could get a picture with you guys?"

Uh, OK.

It was a successful first troop.  Although, you can tell from the picture I have no idea what to do with my hands.  Kyle, (who is the trooper on the left), gave me a long talk about properly holding my blaster.  Admittedly, I was terrible at it.  I couldn't see my hands well enough to correct my grip.  Even with my helmet on properly, there's no vision below the chin.  However, in time,  I figured out learned to grip it correctly by feel.  That would come much later, though, after a great deal more time behind the green lens.

So, what other lessons did I learn from my first troop?

Failures happen on the armor.  All the time.  Expect it.  Don't stress on it.  Just be prepared, and if possible, go fix it.  Always carry a repair kit in your armor bin.  A member of my garrison has even designed a Field Emergency Kit which can be worn on a belt by handlers and looks like a lightsaber.  (They insist on calling it a FEK for short.  I am not crazy about the name.)  But, it contains costume repair essentials to hold us together.  After 30 or so troops now, pieces tend to fall off less and I can more or less see out of the blasted helmet.  Or, pretend I can.  But, there would be many more troops in-between before I reached this point.  And, this means I have many more stories.

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